4. Baby-proof your sex life
If you’ve just had a baby, vaginal tissue is tender and hormones are haywire. So sex is probably the last thing on your mind. “Often it takes months or up to a year for women to feel comfortable about sex again,” says Supple. “And some men find themselves depressed because, all of a sudden, much of the focus is on the baby and there’s no time left for him.”
So how do you baby-proof your sex life? Start slowly and create opportunities for sex to happen. At least twice a year, have a weekend away, and if you can, take a one-week holiday with just your partner every year. If you feel guilty about leaving the kids, remember they will benefit from having happy parents. “Think of time alone together as an investment in your relationship,” says Supple.
She also recommends planning “sex nights.” Once or twice a month, hire a babysitter and go on a date with your partner—no matter how tired or unsexy you feel. “Go to dinner or a movie, come home with the kids hopefully asleep, turn off your phones and TV, and leave the worries of work, bills or anything else at the bedroom door.”